Operation Celebrate!

Guess what, guys?! It only took 7 days! (see previous post and picture below)

 

(forgive me for the backwards name, I love mirrored images on PhotoBooth)

So since my life is now awesome because it was proven that the government doesn't hate me as much as I thought after all, I have cause to celebrate. CELEBRATE GOOD TIMES, COME ON!

Also, let me remind you that it is a whopping 25 days 'til Christmas! (which I will be spending at the wonderful world of Disney this year. Yes, my brain may be able to process complicated rhetorical theory, but my heart is that of a ten year old in love with Cinderella) Another reason to celebrate! I've completed all but 2 gifts of my Christmas shopping this year before December, and I pride myself with that fact for your information. I'm one of those people who likes the holiday season to last as long as humanly possible because then it feels like my birthday comes faster :) 

On the note of Christmas shopping and last weekend's Black Friday (busiest shopping day of the year), I'll leave you with a joke made up by a wonderful lady that appeared on the Ellen show.

Do you know why they call Black Friday?

-Because people are mournin' the loss of their money!

Celebrate, people!

Every Cup Tells a Story

So as many of you know, I'm impatient. I'm also Canadian. Which brings me to my latest episode of 'finding the daisy among a giant stack of scentless chammomile' (if you will).

Before I venture into this next installment, I advise all future wives: Keep your maiden name OR Marry a man with the exact same last name as you (including the spelling). I take pride in my mother, in that she performed the latter.

The other day, Ryan and I took a bit of an adventure in an attempt to legally change my name on my Social Insurance Card for the second time. Thinking that this would be quick and easy (for some ODD and RIDICULOUS reason) we didn't have lunch before we left.

So after getting lost and redirected to the correct building (I only share this because normally, I'm wonderful with directions, but on this day I was hungry; therefore, throwing off my navigational abilities) we wound up downtown at the Service Canada office. SKETCH-FACTOR. We found ourselves a parking spot marked '2 Hour Parking**' thinking that we would have plenty of time.

**Please note this important time reference.

After entering the office at precisely 11:02 am, we talked to the receptionist, while she recorded my name and my business. She politely spewed her rehearsed speech in our direction: "Please, take a seat and your name will be called by one of our Service Canada agents." So we sit.

...and sit.

......and sit.

.........and SIT.

It is now 12:12 pm. "Whitney BIIIRRRONN!!" (because that's how you say "Braun" in Canada, obviously) The heavens finally opened.

Because the lady was so nice, she decided she would do us a favour by getting our $10 back that we weren't supposed to be charged for, even after I said in my frustrated-from-waiting-over-an-hour-while-my-stomach-eats-itself voice, "I really don't care about my $10. It's No. Big. Deal." But thankfully, because she was SOO KIND, her determination to get our money back possessed her to dial a man in Newfoundland. This said man then proceeded to screw up this wonderful service agent's computer information, causing her to lose my data and forcing her to start again. 12:27 pm ticks by.

After the reboot, which was completed by 12:36 pm, this lovely woman belched her federal courtesies to us in the form: "You're new Social Insurance Card will be mailed to you in 10-15 days."

So at 12:42 pm, Ryan and I escaped a parking violation by the hair on our chinny-chin-chin. Also, at this moment in time, I started to debate why my nationality was so very important to me.

(Please read this last bit in your best dramatic poet voice. It's best when recited aloud)

...BUT BEHOLD! Over yonder, the most beautiful brown, yellow, and red sign beckoned me towards its honey-glazed goodness!

Needless to say, I'm still very proud to be Canadian.

Let's see if I can say that 10-15 days from now.

Rewriting the Rewrite

Hey guys! Do you ever get that feeling where your fingernails feel like they've been rubbed up against a chalkboard for the past hour creating a jarring sound of doom and now your ear drums want to give up on life because what they've been hearing is sending painful, ticklish pulses all the way down your spine?

Really?

Because I haven't.

Well, since that is out of our way...

So I recently wrote 2 postcard stories (which are intended to be no more than a page and a half) for my creative writing class, got them back, and was puzzled by the comments I received. I was wondering if I could hear back from a few of you with some suggestions and/or comments. One of the biggest questions I have is regarding the title... my comments deemed it 'too obvious'. Let me know what you think.

Heart Attack

Under. Around. Loop. Pull.

Under. Around. Loop. Pull.

            Her calloused fingers keep the steady rhythm she’s been practicing for over forty years. Her fingernails were always kept short for this crafty purpose, but now they’re just brittle, which keeps them short without the work. Her wrists twist and twirl and twist and twirl, copying the motion of the yarn.

            Under. Around. Loop. Pull.

            That’s how she taught our granddaughter. Sure, her fingers were much shorter, and fingernails much too long, but still she managed to get the hang of it eventually. My wife’s always been the best teacher, except I’m the one who mastered the lasagna recipe. I never attempted the knitting though, too tedious and complicated, not to mention, too womanly.

            Under. Around. Loop. Pull.

            This hobby, her craft, keeps her young, younger than me. I promise, she hasn’t aged since our wedding day, and she’s never been sick, either. I was the one who was sick. Always have been. She listens to the rhythm of my heart, records it in the log, and then continues on her latest afghan like clockwork. I love her routines. If only my heart would keep the same regimen. 

            Under. Around. Loop. Pull.

            I watch as her wrists and nimble fingers do what they’ve done a thousand times before. Twisting and twirling. I feel my heart do the same thing: twist and twirl. It doesn’t feel right, but I sit, watching her in my favourite chair. It does it again, but I ignore it, mesmerized by the yellow yarn weaving in an out, between the needles. Again, twist and twirl.

            Under. Around. Loop. Pull.

            Her rhythm mimics the monitor beside me, keeping track of my heart. I wake up from my nap, and she still sits beside me, knitting. Everyday she comes to visit me; catches the bus and winds up beside my hospital bed in my favourite chair. Everyday, it’s always the best part. Like I’ve never been sick.

            Under. Around. Loop. Pull.

Donuts for Benny

So my wonderful weekend of spending time with some best friends has come to a rather rainy close. However, over the weekend I happened to purchase the most amazing Christmas CD: VeggieTunes Christmas Album. Yes, VeggieTales, I still listen and enjoy the voices of Larry and Mr. Lunt. My favourite so far is  Donuts for Benny. (Click the link to check it out).

The CD was only one highlight of my weekend... GASP! You're thinking She can have more than one wonderful event in a single wonderful weekend! Ya, basically, I can. And the second greatest (not second as in runner up, but second as in the 2nd one I'm telling you about) event of my weekend was decorating our apartment with all of my Christmas decorations! Yes, ladies! I WON the feat against my anti-Christmas-until-December-1st husband. The tree is up! So I owe you all for petitioning along side me :)

And because I'm the victor, I just have to share a few pictures with you all:

So the tree with a few basic trimmings: Ribbon and lights. 

That's right, Mom, ribbon. I learn well.

Finished tree! Complete with my love of traditional angel tree topper and coordinating ornaments. That's right, Mom, coordinated. Again, I learned well.

My lovely wrapped bedroom door. You'll notice the colour combination: Purple and gold to match the tree :)

The Strawberry Daiquiris

Ok people...I'm almost down and out for the count when it comes to school work. I currently have NO motivation to finish assignments, prepare for exams, or lead group discussions on the social classification of preterm babies in the North American culture (True story, I have to do that next week). BUT because my blog is all about finding happy things among the most suckiest of times, I'll attempt to gain a little traction for the next three weeks.

So, here are a few 'strawberry daiquiri's' I have to look forward to:

1) THIS WEEK: One of my BFF's and her hubby will be arriving Wednesday for a weekend stay in our second bedroom, or as I like to call it: The Braun B&B. There may or may not be Christmas decorating involved in our...spontaneous...weekend plans. So: Shout out to Miranda and Wayne for already making my week better!!

2) THIS MONTH: I will complete and hand my ONLY paper that focuses on the language prescription of road signs and why its wording is incredibly important to the most absurd, and unprepared drivers of the Lower Mainland. For the Fort St. Johner's who are right now saying, "No way! There are way worse drivers in FSJ!" Actually, no. People who have a entire truck box full of beer and/or other illegal truck box cargo no longer scare me. It's the 17 year-old mini-skirt wearer who --OMG[osh]-- got invited to a party and is texting all her friends while she is driving on the highway who scares me. So yes, I have that to look forward to.

3) THIS CHRISTMAS: A niece!! 'Nuf said.

4) FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE: Knitting. Even though I will probably develop incredibly bad arthritis in my wrists because of my new found hobby, it will bring me great joy. As much joy as a strawberry daiquiri would bring me at this very moment.