So as most of you are well aware, I'm a 'MRS' now! Braun. Mrs. Braun. (Get it?...Bond, haha) Ryan is currently napping in the middle of the hotel room floor, and I'm bored; therefore, I blog.
Our wedding was absolutely fantastic for all of you who weren't there :) Besides my nerves reaching a level measured by the Ritcher scale before the ceremony, all was relaxed. Apparently, Ryan's nerves hit high gear when he stepped into the sanctuary and realized how much family he really had. (Basically, three-quarters of the guests were Braun's FYI) A few minor hiccups here and there, but no major drama scenes, such as my 10 minute bridezilla moment on Friday witnessed by my parents and Kirst. Don't worry, she had me on a timer; as soon as the 10 minutes was up, I was back to my normal, relaxed, bridal self. Ha! Who are we kidding?!
Whistler is great thus far, minus that fact that I forgot my camera cord. So you'll have to wait a bit longer before I upload any pictures. Oh, and I got my hair chopped off today. Actually. Like 5 inches. You don't believe me, do you? Neither did Ryan until I stepped out of the salon with and undercut reaching a slim 1.5 inches, and a length grazing the top of my shoulders. Ah! How great it feels to instantly lose 5 pounds!
Anyway, back to the renaming of the blog. As Carissa, among other wedding guests can recall, 'W' is for Weeds because I can pick out a 3 inch thistle plant in the ditch going a buck twenty down the divided highway. Thank you, Maid of Honour for pointing out one of my many useless talents. So I decided to switch it up and spot the daisies instead of the dandelions. I hope to keep it cheery and...well, weedless.
Well folks, 113 hours and counting! Woo!
As exciting as that sounds, I feel rather uninspired due to waiting. I finally finished what I can this weekend, and now, I just have to wait. And we all know that this chick lacks in patience skills like a bald man lacks hair. Yeah, it's true. So sadly, I don't have much to write about, but I felt the need to blog...basically, since I know you've all been waiting for my next post.
So just excuse me for this upcoming rant, of sorts. I've been wondering lately if this wedding is the same ol' same ol'. Because that would be lame. Seriously, lame. We've got the ceremony with the 'I do's', the reception with the tinkling champagne glasses, the cutting of the cake business, and the bouquet toss, which I'm sure my 11 year old cousin will snag because we all know that stands for reality, when actually, I have single friends dreaming of that bouquet landing in their un-ringed palm and leading them to their soulmate. Kirst, you know it's true. But today, I'm trying to convince myself that we're different. Here are my reasons:
-We have a guitar player, not a pianist. That's right, take your seats people. I'm going to knock your socks off.
-I'm not wearing a veil. Keep breathing.
-We're not videotaping our ceremony. Go get a glass of water, you're hyperventilating.
-We don't have a flower girl or ringbearer. Go back to the kitchen and grab a paper bag, you're still hyperventilating.
-We are entering our reception to a rather risky number, instead of trumpets and horns. In and out. In and out. Slower!
-We have a purple cake. Not white. Get up off the floor! I'm not done yet!
-Finally, we do NOT have an open bar. Full on cash, people! Ok, I'm going to have to ask you to go lay down. It's for your own safety.
So, uhhh, see you Saturday?
So I got this email from Ryan the other because he "thought it was funny". Funny, my butt. It was a list of RULES that men have, since apparently, woman also have a set of RULES. Let me share a few of the ones that caught my attention:
1. Crying is blackmail.
2. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 days.
3. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.
4. Whenever possible, please say whatever you want during commercials.
5. Christopher Columbus did not need directions. Neither do we.
6. When we have to go somewhere, anything you wear is fine...really.
7. You have to many shoes.
8. I'm in shape. ROUND is a shape.
9. If we ask what is wrong and you say, "nothing", we'll act like nothing is wrong. We know you are lying, but it's just not worth the hassle.
10. ALL men see in only 16 colours, like Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a colour. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.
So after much searching, I've found a few good rules to counter these absurdities. Take a look:
1. The correct answer to, "Do I look fat?" is never, "Yes".
2. A "meh" is seldom an answer to any question.
3. Don't assume PMS is the cause for every bad mood.
4. No means No. Yes means Yes. Silence could mean anything she feels like at that particular moment in time, and it could change without notice.
5. My haircut is never bad.
6. Two words: clean socks.
7. You can be wrong.
8. You can be sorry.
Take that men.